Apr 14, 2016

UFC on Fox 19: Teixeira v. Evans Predictions

The UFC returns to Florda and this time they're in Tampa for some reason. Seriously...Tampa. Are they worried they wouldn't be able to go Miami without having Kimbo Slice on the card? Let me give you a recap of the disastrous lead up to this fight card. The main event was killed by Tony Ferguson having blood in his lungs. The guy replacing Tony Ferguson has to cut 21 pounds in 9 days and has never fought in the UFC before. The previous co-main event of Shogun Rua v. Rashad Evans was destroyed by Shogun managing to hurt his knee for about the 30th time.   The event lost Dan Henderson v. Lyoto Machida because Machida admitted to being on PEDs.  Oh well...we still have Rose Namajunas on the card. I am willing to watch Thug Rose fight absolutely anybody. Check out our predictions below. Also, look at the standings because I'm straight dominating. The game answers to me now.

Glover Teixeira v. Rashad Evans
Apparently Rashad's dog is the Beast from The Sandlot

This fight became the main event after Tony Ferguson was forced to pulled out of his scheduled matchup with Khabib Nurmagomedov 11 days before the fight. For some reason the UFC also decided to convince these two grizzled veterans to agree to a 5 round fight. Rashad needs a good showing in this fight. He looked old and slow against Ryan Bader back in October. With a good performance against Glover, Evans can show that performance was the result of 2 years of injuries rather the game passing him by. I still think he loses to Glover here, but I'm not terribly confident in that pick. It depends which Glover shows up and if he's training at home or not. Also, as the great Jack Slack pointed out...Glover is predictable as hell. All he's throwing is the cross counter. Despite that, I still think he takes this on points. Glover by decision.

Picking Teixeira: DJ Mark, Kid P, Dr. Law
Picking "Suga" Rashad: Gooms

Kid Presentable is right. It is a cool logo.
Lyoto Machida v. Dan Henderson

Alright, we're going to do it again. Machida v. Hendo. Wait...Machida admitted to taking a banned substance? Oh, he says it's something that just became banned this year? That's not that bad. Oh it's been banned since 2008? So Machida is completely full of sh*t? You mean to tell me that Mousasi was telling the truth when claiming he was on PEDs? Well alright. All hail Mousasi. He predicts deez tings.

Cub Swanson v. Hacran Dias

We didn't talk about this on the podcast because unfortunately we do not "predict deez tings." Cub needs to win this fight badly. He looked terrible against both Frankie Edgar and Max Holloway. Hacran Dias tends to fold when he faces top competition. All of us are picking Cub Swanson or, as Kid Presentable put it, "the guy with the cool logo." Killer Cub by decision.

Picking Swanson: All of us
Swear to God. This is real.

Khabib Nurmagomedov v. Darrell Horcher

Horcher's Manager: Hey Darrell, I got you a UFC fight.
Horcher: That's awesome, when is it?
Manager: In 9 days at 160 pounds.
Horcher: Well alright...it's gonna be a tough cut. Who am I facing?
Manager: Khabib Nurmagomedov
Horcher: ...
Manager: hello?
Horcher: *click*

Picking Khabib: All of us

Rose Namajunas v. Tecia Torres
said sweet infographic

Thug Rose makes her return to the octagon after absolutely smashing Paige VanZant back in December. She aims to get revenge on Tecia Torres as Torres defeated Namajunas by decision back in Invicta. Tecia Torres is undefeated...but not really. We all saw her lose twice on The Ultimate Fighter. Rose's skills are developing rapidly while it appears that Tecia hasn't progressed as much. As the sweet infographic to the right shows, every single one of Torres's wins are via decision while Rose is the definition of a finisher. I think Rose has passed Tecia by and should put her away in this one.  Rose by 2nd round submission.

Picking Thug Rose: All of us

I like this more than anything either fighter
has posted on social media. 

Beneil Dariush v. Michael Chiesa

Good lord lightweight is a tough division. You have to win 6 fights in a row before they even consider giving you a title shot. If you win 6 straight fights at heavyweight that means you have already successfully defended your title 3 times. This is a fun matchup between two young lightweight studs. Chiesa is coming off of his best performance to date as he put away Jim Miller. Beneil Dariush is coming off a gift decision in a fight against Michael Johnson. Hey, he may be Iranian, but I calls them like I sees them. I still got Dariush taking this one. Chiesa depends nearly exclusively on grappling and Dariush is simply better in that aspect of the game. Also, I'm not picking against the Iranian guy. Dariush by decision.

Picking Dariush: DJ Mark, Dr. Law, Kid P
Picking Chiesa: Gooms

It's MMAzing 2016 Standings
1. Doctor Law - (35-17) - .673
2. DJ Mark- (33-19) - .635
3. Lavender Gooms  - (29-23) - .558
4. Kid Presentable - (27-25) - .519

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